Welcome
to Chianti's Pastarology
Discover Your Future in The Stars!
Click here for The Latest News Update!
Chianti here. Allow me to introduce myself: Chianti's the name, Pasta's the game. Anthony Chianti, Licensed Private Eye and Community Pasta Detective, reporting on the stars and your neighborhood noodles. Click for an update on my adventures here in The Wabasso Triangle.
The Ugly Details: Many years ago, long before TV and pizza were invented, people with nothing better to do lay down in fields and stared at the night sky. (Yeah... sound familiar?) Mainly due to their chemically-induced condition they joined up the dots. In their fertile Neanderthal imagination the stars turned into animals and symbols. Does that sound scientific to you?
The Good News: Fortunately, modern technology has put an end to all that superstitious nonsense. Today we know that it's ridiculous to superimpose images of animals on the night sky when the patterns of the stars actually form very accurate outlines of pasta. Yes, pasta. Amazing but true.
That's right,
Hippies. No more
of that flaky, woo-woo Astrology now we have high-tech,
scientifically-proven Quantum Pastarology.
Click
on your star sign to see your Pastascope
 Fusillonius |
 Zitius |
 Radiatorus |
 Farfallus |
 Lasagnius |
 Linguinius |
 Rigatonius |
 Tortellinius |
 Raviolus |
 Fettucinius |
 Spaghettius |
 Cannellonius |
What Pasta Sign Am I?
|
Fusillonius |
|
| Zitius April 21 - May 21 |
|
| Radiatorus May 22 - June 21 |
|
| Farfallus June 22 - July 22 |
|
| Lasagnius July 23 - Aug 22 |
|
| Linguinius Aug 23 - Sep 23 |
|
| Rigatonius Sep 24 - Oct 23 |
|
| Tortellinius Oct 24 - Nov 22 |
|
| Raviolus Nov 23 - Dec 21 |
|
| Fettucinius Dec 22 - Jan 20 |
|
| Spaghettius Jan 21 - Feb 19 |
|
| Cannellonius Feb 20 - Mar 20 |
|